daddy and altzheimer

last summer we found a nice place for my dad, sunrise of east meadow, the reflection wing. the people there are like my dad, mostly ambulatory, but in the stages of dementia beyond where they are able to care for themselves. they are a motley crew and when my dad first went there i thought he didnt belong, but now i think hes in a safe comforting environment that gives me the peace to know hes as healthy as can be.

the only problem is he wants with every breath of his being to go home. he doesnt even know his address he just knows thats what he wants. im going to visit him and hes going to implore me to take him home. he is going to rant and rattle then throw me out. i have to steel myself for the visit. its like hes now the child who wants to go outside without his shoes, he has to learn to listen to others and do what he doesnt want to do. that is not what my dad is like.....

So once a week I take him out to Ben's for a Pastrami Sandwich or bring him his favorite chocolate shake. We sit an share short conversation about the weather or news. Then, I leave and he is well taken care of and protected from himself. He would be a danger to himself so I have to be strong.